somewhere only we know
by keep my issues drawn
Summary: -and if you have a minute why don't we go/talk about it somewhere only we know?/this could be the end of everything/so why don't we go somewhere only we know?- Galeniss, for Jo.


_This is for Jo (just another capitol slave). I love you Jo, I've known you for so many years now and I'm so happy to call you my friend. I hope you enjoy this. Happy Birthday! (for tomorrow, as i wanted to upload it now 'cause i'm an impatient freak who is currently crying over glee) _

_And just for the record, I couldn't buy the Hunger Games rights for you for your birthday, so you don't own rights to the Hunger Games, and for the benefit of other readers, neither do I. Nor do I own the lyrics to Somewhere Only We Know. _

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><p><em>and if you have a minute why don't we go<em>

_talk about it somewhere only we know?_

_this could be the end of everything_

_so why don't we go somewhere only we know?_

**- Somewhere Only We Know; Keane **

/

He misses her. He can't have her back, of course, but he misses her desperately and frantically and he needs her. District Two is only a distraction from his home. Sure, he can go off to District Two, do whatever he needs to do, but in the end District Twelve is and always will be his home. His home will always be where Katniss is. He knows that, and yet he can't bring himself to go back. He can't go back because he knows Katniss blames him for what happened. To tell the truth, he blames himself too.

Maybe it was all heat against heat; the two of them together. Maybe Katniss does need Peeta to balance her out he tries to tell himself. He hates it. He hates their relationship, even though he tries to tell himself that he should let them be. It was created by the Capitol, and Gale thinks they should always remember that. It wasn't their choice. Okay, maybe it was Peeta's choice, but not Katniss' choice. Never her choice.

He misses hunting with her. He still does it sometimes. Now the Districts are free from the Capitol the defences are more lenient, and he can get out to hunt. Not with her, never with her. She's with Peeta now, he mutters to himself, under his breath. She doesn't want you, Gale, he tells himself. It becomes his mantra over the days and weeks and months. _She doesn't want you_. _She loves Peeta. She chose Peeta. She doesn't want you_. It's a numb way of bringing himself back to reality, and maybe it's good to be facing reality, even if it does bring him this fresh wave of pain every time he thinks about it. She left him for Peeta. That's all he needs to know. And yet he can't help missing her.

Did all of that not mean anything? Did all of their childhood spent as friends not mean anything? Sure, without Peeta she'd be dead, but without Gale she'd be dead as well. Did he not save her from starvation by helping her hunt? Did he not help her shoot the buck that paid for Prim's goat? He stops thinking of Prim, because it hurts, and he knows Katniss thinks it was his fault. He knows this, he tells himself, of course she must hold him responsible. He sighs, knowing that it probably was his fault. How was he to know who would be in there? he asks himself. How on earth was he to know? He laughs; he can almost hear Katniss in his head. _So you wouldn't have cared if Prim wasn't in there? If it was just Capitolites? _And it scares him, because he knows his answer would be yes. Even though the rebellion is over he knows he'd do it all over again without a blink of his eye. He'd kill again, if he had to. If he had to protect the future generations, fight for himself and Katniss and future tributes in the Hunger Games. But Katniss hates him now, and he has to remind himself of that. Katniss hates him, he killed her baby sister. Even if Prim wasn't such a baby any more, she still was to Katniss. And he killed her. She won't forgive him. He wishes he had one more chance to see her. To talk to her. He knows that won't happen though, so he sets his snares in the forest outside District Two, wishing that Katniss was beside him shooting down birds, shooting squirrels and rabbits, and then he tells himself to stop. Wishing isn't going to change anything, and so he won't wish. He stays concentrated on his work then, not allowing his mind to slip to thoughts of Katniss and Peeta, Peeta and Katniss and Prim.

Of course he doesn't think of them. That would be stupid. That part of his life is gone now—it's time to move on.

/

She misses him. She can't have him back, of course, but she misses him desperately. Sometimes she wonders if she made the right choice. Peeta or Gale, Gale or Peeta. She didn't want to choose, she never did. It had to happen though, and so it did. She's still not sure if she can forgive Gale. Maybe it wasn't entirely his fault, but she still can't forget the last time she saw Prim. She chooses not to dwell on it, because it hurts too much, but all she can think of in her mind is that little duck's tail that Prim's blouse formed on her first reaping day, the day that Katniss' life changed forever. She still hasn't lost her love for Prim, the reason that she volunteered in the first place. She never agreed with those traps that Gale and Beetee set. She sighs, knowing that they had to do it. She can't forget what the Capitol did to her. What they did to all of the people of the Districts. Bile rises up in her throat, her anger prominent, and she spits out onto the mossy ground, and notches another arrow, spying a squirrel in the upper branches of a tree.

She misses. This hasn't happened in a long time, and she doesn't like it, not at all. It's strange, not shooting humans any more. It's wonderful, of course, not to have to take their lives, but it's strange and she's not quite sure how she's going to adjust back into her old life. Back to District Twelve. She supposes that's all that it was ever going to be. She started in District Twelve, and she's gone back to District Twelve, and that's what was always going to happen. No matter where she went it was _always _back to District Twelve. District Twelve is her home, but she's not sure that she likes that really.

The squirrel has scampered off after her arrow failed to pierce it. She thinks of Peeta. Peeta telling Haymitch about her shooting talent. She smiles. She tells herself she's made the right choice, and she goes about hunting again. She doesn't miss a single shot.

The thought doesn't come out of the back of her mind until she's in the clearing with the lake again. She remembers her father, and then she thinks of Gale. He's a true District Twelve guy, just like her father. She finds herself thinking about that kiss again. It always goes back to that kiss, doesn't it? The first time she kissed him, and she's thinking of it like a defining moment. There are moments that define each and every person, and that kiss, that _moment_ defined her. She closes her eyes. Why is everything spinning round in circles, making a choice she's already made impossible to make? It's not fair, it's totally unfair. She's already made this choice, and yet it's coming back to haunt her again, and she's thinking of Gale again, and it hurts more than it should.

_Prim_. She says to herself. That should be the deciding factor. Then again, if it was Peeta would win. She's not sure if she wants that to happen any more. Maybe Peeta balances her out, but Gale is fire. Sure, she's fire too, but who says they can't burn the whole forest down? Who says they can't collide in a beautiful, mesmirising way and set the world on fire?

She stands up from the rock she's been perching on and jogs out of the woods with purpose. Somehow, somewhere, she has to find Gale Hawthorne.

/

The access between Districts is easier now the Capitol is fallen. She finds a train, and she gets on it. She leaves a note for Peeta, a short one, and she knows that he'll be heartbroken when he finds out, but she just can't leave Gale in District Two, knowing that there's something _more_, something unresolved between the two of them.

_Peeta, _

_I've gone to District Two. I hope you can try to understand. _

_K. E. _

She tries not to think of anything as the world rushes past outside her train window, and she tries not to think of Peeta, because she knows that she loves him too, but there's something not quite right between them. She loves Peeta, but she _loves_ Gale, and there's all the difference between the two of those loves, even though she can't quite pinpoint it. She begins to feel sick and shaky, and she wonders if it's the right choice, the right thing to do. She chose _Peeta_. But there's something about that relationship that makes sure she can never forget what's she's been through. It was fabricated by the Capitol, and even if she began to feel for Peeta, it would still always have that beginning, and she can't erase that, no matter how hard she tries. With Gale, there's more to it than that. They came together because of the Capitol, yes, but to unite against them, and to try and survive in a world that was tumbling down. And she thinks she loves him. She hasn't dared say it out loud yet, but she will, oh, she will.

She loves him.

She loves Gale.

She loves him more than anything.

She's willing to forgive him, and maybe right now she doesn't care about what he's done. All that she cares about is that she needs his fire to survive, and he needs her fire. Together they can burn the forest down, she's sure of that, and it's a happy thought, however chaotic it may seem.

The train draws into District Two, and she shudders. She can still remember the fights that took place here, trying to crack the nut, and all with Gale by her side. She wonders how he can return there after that, but she takes a deep breath and pushes on. She digs in her pocket, a slip of paper bearing an address that he sent her, should she ever need him. She finds out the location of it from a nearby man, and she jogs off, trying to find him and tell him those three words that she's been meant to say since she was born.

/

He senses something, and he looks outside his window, having got back from the woods. He gasps, and does a double take. How could Katniss be there? He doesn't quite believe it, but he goes to his door and Katniss is there, and _God_, she's actually there and alive and so real. Her hair is in her usual braid, and it's all he can do not to take her in his arms right there and then.

"Hey," he murmurs.

She looks up at him, eyes alight, and then looks down to her feet, "Hey," she mutters, raising her hand self-consciously to her braid.

He opens the door wider, beckoning for her to come in, but she shakes her head, and motions to the bow on her back. He runs in, grabs his weapons and he leads the way to the wood.

They don't hunt for a while. They sit on a rock in a clearing, and they are silent. What can they say to break the silence? Neither of them have ever been good with words, especially not in romantic situations. They can't deal with those long romantic speeches, and they need to get to the other, but they're not sure how. Their legs touch the others, but there is a space between them that seems like it can never be closed. They don't have the words to say what they so desperately want to put across, and so they sit in silence, staring into the horizon as they watch the sun go down.

"Why are you here?" Gale asks, breaking the silence.

Katniss looks at him, "Why do you want me to be here?" she whispers, listening to the songs of the mockingjays around them.

Gale throws his bow to the ground, "Why are you here?" he repeats, "Please, don't turn this into another game. I thought you'd have had enough of those for a lifetime."

She looks down at her feet, suitably abashed, and opens her mouth, as if to say something, and then closes it again. She shakes her head, and clenches her teeth.

"I love you," she says, and then clamps a hand across her mouth. She asks herself why she came out with it just like that, and she can't really answer herself.

Gale takes her arm, lays a hand on it, and an electric vibe goes down it, making Katniss feel weak at the knees. She looks up at him, her eyes full of trust, and then her eyes go dark again.

"I can't-" she whispers, and then he silences her by pressing a worn finger to her lips.

"I love you too," he murmurs, and then he takes her in his arms.

She's a little disappointed that he doesn't kiss her, if she's honest, but it feels good in his arms. He's strong and sturdy, and she feels like she _belongs _there. She fits there, and it's perfect and it's beautiful, and she belongs with him, she does. She pulls apart, and looks him up and down.

And then it happens. His lips crash onto hers, and she returns the favour, and then they're kissing like their lives depend on it, and she feels like maybe they do. It's all of the fire of them put into one kiss filled with passion, and behind that passion _love_. Her hands rise up to his face, and she takes it in her hands, and runs his hair through her fingers as they continue to kiss. It doesn't feel perfect. But it sure as hell feels like heaven.

In the woods is a place that can never be taken from them. It doesn't matter where the woods are, but they're _theirs_, and no one can take that from them when they're together, when they're kissing, when they're running and diving and hunting and doing everything that is Katniss&Gale.

They're broken, irredeemably so, but it doesn't really matter. It's fire on fire and Katniss on Gale and they know that maybe they're going to destroy everything, but they're together and it feels so good.

They pull apart, and they stare at each other for a moment, taking the other in, everything about them, and they smile, and they begin to laugh. They laugh for a few minutes, and then they dive back into that kiss, and this time it's sweet and perfect, and they realise that maybe they're not perfect for each other, but hey, who asked for perfection anyway?

They lie on the grassy ground kissing until the sun goes down.

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><p><em>I hope you enjoyed it Jo! <em>

_And the rest of you, of course!_

_Just for the record, I didn't have time to get this beta'd, and, um, i didn't really proof read it so if word didn't pick it up, neither did I. Let me know any mistakes! _

_Please don't favourite without reviewing. :) _


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